Another chance

I  aver all of us have made mistakes, some of them so grave we wonder how we got away with murder. Yet some have made lesser degree mistakes and paid with their lives. Worse still, some have suffered from someone else’s mistake and paid dearly.

I saw a young man excited with getting a driver’s licence. He made a mistake that borders on the smallest margin of error and it cost him his young life and some road users yet on many days we swerve across lanes, nearly side swiping oncoming traffic yet we have lived to tell the story. In all these dimensions it is always a chance granted, missed or gained. Such is life.

Living life today has taught me to value all the chances I have had. I look back at the time I nearly died and read it as a chance to be a better person and strive to impact more positively on others. I look at the ruined relationships I have come from and I learn of a chance to learn the values of love and not to walk the path of dreary pain again.

I look at the job I have, minus what I hoped for and I read a chance to be able to make the best of what I am yet still reaching out to my dream. I see people who forgave me when I wronged them and in them I see a chance to build better and greater relationships.

I look at my mother and the towering resilience she has always borne and I learn from her about a chance to be a better parent given that she never had even a quarter of the resources that I have yet she raised me to be what I am.

I have the memory of my father. In him I see the best chance to know that my fate lies in my hand and that all the chances I am being given are meant to make me see things better and impact others in a better dimension.

We have not been lucky, no; we have been given another chance to be better and to be more positive.

As the sun rises tomorrow, count your chances and ask yourself –  did you deserve them more than the other person who did not get them?

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dark secrets

A person who has many secrets can only be a friend of darkness, fear and nerve-wracking moments. Keeping secrets (read concealing the truth) has a price. I am yet to find a person who retained the same trust in a person after discovering that the same person had concealed a fact or truth about themselves.

A person who has secrets fears being discovered. They are always on the edge and needless to say, they are not free. Secrets are bad slave masters that draw all the vitality out of one, secrets bear a big emotional burden that denies one the opportunity to savour and enjoy the present moment.

Secrets are cancerous (for lack of a better word). The contagion they bring cannot remain contained in one area and the ultimate end is destruction. Keeping secrets challenges our fidelity and honesty. It calls to task the vows of truth that we took; it challenges our moral being and I believe that it is futile to harbor things that would rather be out in the open.

Secrets are destructive. I have seen families destroyed when long hidden secrets come out unintentionally. People have had their destinies totally altered by unraveling secrets and at most times the cost in terms of emotion and pain is unbearable. Decades of love, adoration and trust are destroyed by something that could have been tackled in its stages of infancy.

I know fear binds most of us to keeping our dark horses in the cupboards but I believe I would rather suffer the shame of a confession that the penalty of concealment. I am convinced that we might shield our dark spots from public scrutiny but how do you hide your nakedness (read weakness) from your soul mate??

The dark world continues to lord it over us because we continue to retain the elements of that negative world in us. When we find ourselves open to blackmail, abuse, manipulation it is because our dark secrets are holding us to ransom.

A confession is difficult. It brings humility and penitence but it is less expensive than a dark secret hidden in the open awaiting a foot to stumble on it and expose it.

As the sun rises would you rather confess or pay the burden of harbouring darkness??